Shit. It's going to be 92 fucking degrees on Friday. I think I'm going out to the boat. I need a day out there, recharge my shit and whatever. Riley, I don't think you're working (even if you are, we can do our best to fix that), want to come? Mark, you don't do shit anyway, do you know how to swim? I don't want to have to rescue you when you fall over the side.
Jun. 29th, 2011
Jun. 14th, 2011
Has anyone ever seen that commercial for that bike that's basically like a giant backwards motorized tricycle?
Here it is:
What the hell is that? That's like a child's toy! That's not a motorcycle! It's ridiculous! I'm actually sort of offended by this, and by people who ride it! Though, come to think of it, I haven't actually ever seen one in real life, so maybe everyone else thinks it's as inane as I do?
Here it is:
What the hell is that? That's like a child's toy! That's not a motorcycle! It's ridiculous! I'm actually sort of offended by this, and by people who ride it! Though, come to think of it, I haven't actually ever seen one in real life, so maybe everyone else thinks it's as inane as I do?
Jun. 10th, 2011
[private to riley]
You out gettin drunk like all the young kids do on Friday night?
You out gettin drunk like all the young kids do on Friday night?
May. 12th, 2011
Someone tried to pawn a plane today. They wouldn't tell me where they'd parked it or take me to see it, just held up a pair of keys and said it was a "sessionica, you know, one of them little planes" (I assume he meant a Cessna?). Needless to say, I was not convinced. Now I know that pretty much everyone, everywhere has money problems, and that probably extends to people who actually own planes. But I somehow doubt that gentleman standing in my shop this morning trying to convince me that "sessionica" was a type of plane and that he owned one and wanted to sell it to me, actually did own a plane.
On top of that, I'm pretty sure Jason wants to get fired because he spent the entire day playing Lady Gaga every time I turned away from the radio and now she's stuck in my head, so let's discuss because if I need to have her songs stuck in my head so do all of you. The one in particular I'd like to talk about is called Money Honey (see what she did there with the rhyming? GENIUS)
The first bit goes something like this:
Damn, I love the jam, the jet and the mansion. (Oh yeah)
And I enjoy the gifts and the trips to the islands.(Oh yeah)
Its good to live expensive
You know it, but my knees get weak intensive
When you give me k-kisses
Now, the first part, those are all sentiments I can agree with. I too love jets and mansions and gifts and trips to the islands, Lady GaGa. It is good to live expensive(ly). But then there's a bit about her knees and kisses and here's where it gets confusing for me.
That's money honey,
Well I'm your lover and your mistress
That's money honey
When you touch me, its so delicious
That's money honey
Baby when you tell me the pieces
That's money honey
That's m-o-n-e-y...so sexy
Sorry, GaGa. Kisses =/= money. I mean, unless you're suggesting you're a prostitute, in which case, sure, money = kisses. Or unless she's saying that she only likes this mystery guy cos he's the one who bought her the aforementioned mansions and trips to the islands (sidenote: who is this guy buying people mansions because I would very much like to meet him).
She continues with more lyrics that start out promising:
Damn, I love the boat by the beach on the west coast. (Oh yeah)
And I enjoy some fine champagne
While my girls toast (Oh yeah)
Its good to live expensive
You know it but, my knees get weak intensive
When you give me k-kisses
Shit yeah, I love boats on the beaches and fine champagne, too! I can identify with these lyrics! But then there's that stuff about her knees again, I'm really thinking this guy is some sort of sugar daddy. GaGa, I'm not sure whether to be disappointed in you or give you a high five through time.
You know I appreciate
The finer things
But its not what makes me happy as baby (I can do without a thing)
The turn in loving is more than I can handle
Never burn out this candle oh baby...baby
Ah, there we go. Spelling it out for us. Apparently she doesn't really love all those things she mentioned, not as much as she loves this mystery guy ("the turn in loving", I'm not sure if that phrase is correct or even what it means and my mind is only going to bad places so I'll skip my interpretation of it).
Aaaand I'm disappointed, GaGa. You should've stuck out for the money. Instead you went and fell in love with your sugar daddy and now you're screwed. Emotional attachments are so 2008. Which I guess is appropriate though, because that's when this song came out.
That wraps up this segment of Jude Dissects Ridiculous Lyrics (I'm thinking maybe a catchier title is needed?). In conclusion: I'm revoking Jason's right to touch the stereo.
On top of that, I'm pretty sure Jason wants to get fired because he spent the entire day playing Lady Gaga every time I turned away from the radio and now she's stuck in my head, so let's discuss because if I need to have her songs stuck in my head so do all of you. The one in particular I'd like to talk about is called Money Honey (see what she did there with the rhyming? GENIUS)
The first bit goes something like this:
Damn, I love the jam, the jet and the mansion. (Oh yeah)
And I enjoy the gifts and the trips to the islands.(Oh yeah)
Its good to live expensive
You know it, but my knees get weak intensive
When you give me k-kisses
Now, the first part, those are all sentiments I can agree with. I too love jets and mansions and gifts and trips to the islands, Lady GaGa. It is good to live expensive(ly). But then there's a bit about her knees and kisses and here's where it gets confusing for me.
That's money honey,
Well I'm your lover and your mistress
That's money honey
When you touch me, its so delicious
That's money honey
Baby when you tell me the pieces
That's money honey
That's m-o-n-e-y...so sexy
Sorry, GaGa. Kisses =/= money. I mean, unless you're suggesting you're a prostitute, in which case, sure, money = kisses. Or unless she's saying that she only likes this mystery guy cos he's the one who bought her the aforementioned mansions and trips to the islands (sidenote: who is this guy buying people mansions because I would very much like to meet him).
She continues with more lyrics that start out promising:
Damn, I love the boat by the beach on the west coast. (Oh yeah)
And I enjoy some fine champagne
While my girls toast (Oh yeah)
Its good to live expensive
You know it but, my knees get weak intensive
When you give me k-kisses
Shit yeah, I love boats on the beaches and fine champagne, too! I can identify with these lyrics! But then there's that stuff about her knees again, I'm really thinking this guy is some sort of sugar daddy. GaGa, I'm not sure whether to be disappointed in you or give you a high five through time.
You know I appreciate
The finer things
But its not what makes me happy as baby (I can do without a thing)
The turn in loving is more than I can handle
Never burn out this candle oh baby...baby
Ah, there we go. Spelling it out for us. Apparently she doesn't really love all those things she mentioned, not as much as she loves this mystery guy ("the turn in loving", I'm not sure if that phrase is correct or even what it means and my mind is only going to bad places so I'll skip my interpretation of it).
Aaaand I'm disappointed, GaGa. You should've stuck out for the money. Instead you went and fell in love with your sugar daddy and now you're screwed. Emotional attachments are so 2008. Which I guess is appropriate though, because that's when this song came out.
That wraps up this segment of Jude Dissects Ridiculous Lyrics (I'm thinking maybe a catchier title is needed?). In conclusion: I'm revoking Jason's right to touch the stereo.